Tuesday, 22 November 2011

How to be successfully annoying in Facebook?

Here are some tips:

Want to be an eligible bachelor? 

                      Then start writing (and linking ) all society related issues. Keep attached and informed about Anna Hazare, Anti Corruption Movement etc., (The girls should forget that you are the one who bunked all the NCC/NSS classes in  college!!)
Want a 'Youth' image? 
                    Then these words are must in your text - cool, dude, man!, yar!, LOL etc.. Also make sure none of your words are in their correct spelling -donw, wtsup like that (readers should loose at least few hairs decrypting your message)
For girls
             Keep posting the pictures of you and your friends. You must look like Catherine Zeta Jones in all the photos ( doesn't matter even if rest of your friends look like characters of horror movie..)
For Husbands 
             Is your wife mad about you, for not spending enough time at home?? Then keep posting the pictures of you and your wife, you and your kids till she finally understands that you actually want to see them, all the time (only in pictures?)

For Housewives
           Keep wishing others for Anniversaries, Birthdays, House warming, baby showers etc, You will soon be the sweet-heart of everyone including your in-laws.
For IT men
           Want a "Brilliant guy" tag ?  Then write heavy subjects like Astrophysics ,Women Power, World Economy in paras with sentences separated only with commas.  (புரிஞ்ச மாதிரியும் இருக்கணும் ஆனா யாருக்கும் புரியவும் கூடாது.கிட்டத்தட்ட கமல் ஹாசன் பேச்சு போல)
Are you a pretty lass? 
             Already have a fan following at college or office? Then you can write almost anything. Even if you write ' ate millagai bajji - stomach upset - going to threw up ', 6 or 7 men would promptly  "Like it" within half an hour.
Are you above 60?
             Then you must be in Facebook more often than rest of the world. In this way you can show the world that you are strong (technically). Added advantage - You still have the chance to watch over your children.
For All :
       Link all the videos you watch in Facebook. Doesn't matter whether it is good or not. You watched it, right??good enough for rest of the world to view it..
For those who write in Tamil:
               "கடவுள் ஆக
                மனிதனின்
                வரத்திற்கு 
                காத்திருக்கும்
                 கல்."           - இது போன்று, மடக்கி மடக்கி கவிதை எழுத தெரிந்திருக்க வேண்டும்.

அல்லது, "கடுகு டப்பாவும் பின்னே ஞானும்"  என்று தலைப்பு வைக்க தெரிய வேண்டும். ("பின்னே ஞானும்" என்று தலைப்பில் இருந்தால் இலக்கிய வாசம் வரும் என்று, நண்பர் ஒருவர் தன் மாமியார் மேல் சத்தியம் செய்கிறார். )




7 comments:

  1. akka blog supera irruku..pls continue writing interestin stuffs.

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  2. suresh sabesan ithulla entha entha category??? (youth...IT men...Pretty lass etc.)

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  3. Vigna Akka.. Facebooka allasi araichi panni ache pola.. It's nice..

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  4. Good one and quite a good observation, Vigna. Btw, why did you vanish from Facebook? - Sumathee

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  5. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  6. Vigna I fully agree with you. Reading tamil words in english is killing me and the Facebook is ful of that. You have stopped giving the use of Facebook upto the age 60 what about the man at the age of 90
    Subramanian

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  7. FB kku thuruppi va..(பின்னே ஞானும் vandhu nee enna category nu solren..:)

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